Wednesday, August 1, 2012

emerging from my nymphal skeleton

I am constantly amazed at the amount of nature I discover in my own back yard.  This weekend we found a cicada in the process of emerging from his nymphal skeleton(I googled it to get that phrase).  It was so cool and so I sat down to watch it.


As I sat there the slightly twisted part of me got to thinking about how easy it would be for me to just reach over and pull it out (which my years of watching the nature channel with hubby have taught me is not good for it.)  Or I could just kill it, they do make annoying sounds.  A little flick and it would be gone.  Or a bird or other animal could easily swing by and eat it while it was emerging.  I mean, you can't tell in these pictures but, it wasn't moving very fast.


Which got me to thinking about how vulnerable it was.  Yet here it was taking the big risk to literally break out of its shell and become something greater.  And that got me to thinking about taking a risk, allowing myself to be vulnerable so that I can become more.  It is hard to drop your guard, slowly start stretching beyond your normal boundaries and hope that while you are getting out and finding your footing nobody comes along and squashes you or eats you.


In a few weeks I am going to launch my new web site for women who have gone back to work after being at home.  I have been talking about this idea for a year as I struggled to transition without finding any resources to encourage me.  As I get closer to completing the site and thinking about the launching, it is both exciting and terrifying.  And I definitely feel vulnerable.  But I know that in order to grow and become, in order to reach my goals and provide for this family while John is in school, I need to take risks and I believe they will be worth the effort.

Cicada, Tibicen spp., emerging from nymphal skeleton.  Photo by Dwight Bohlmeyer.
(this picture is from a web site, I wasn't patience enough to see it come out)

So when you see my project next month try not to squish me.


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