Last Sunday I rallied the family for a little cleaning time. I assigned my husband the vacuuming duty as I have since day one of our marriage when I informed him vacuuming must be men's work because I sweat when I do it. I have vacuumed many times since becoming a full time homemaker but anytime we take a team cleaning approach vacuuming duty always reverts back to John. I cleaned the bathrooms while he vacuumed and then went to mop the hardwood floors and kitchen floor when he was done. As I began I came across crumbs, and then more and then it became apparent that he hadn't vacuumed the hard floors at all but just hit the area rug in the living room and Isabelle's bedroom and then did the downstairs. At first it was funny, but then I started feeling put off and I came to the conclusion that he didn't really want to vacuum and he purposely did a crappy job yet never told me he didn't want to vacuum. I was upset that rather than telling me the truth he would just do the crappy job. I mean, if he told me ahead then I would have just done it myself and it would have been fine. I was in cleaning mode and wouldn't have minded if he wasn't. However, when he does a crappy job and now I have to re-do the whole thing when I wasn't expecting to then that is just mean. And now I am mad. So I inform him I am mad that he would do such a crappy job on purpose when he could have just told me that he didn't want to vacuum. He looks at me like I have totally lost my mind, like he has entered an alternate universe. Since the truth was that he didn't know I usually vacuumed all the hard floors upstairs and while he wasn't in the mood to do his typical detailed vacuuming job he was more than happy to help out with the vacuuming. It was not some secret message to me about how he was bitter about having to help out. Although now that I was attacking him for nothing he was feeling a little bitter.
But I thought...
I must admit this is definitely not the first time I have been mad at him because I jumped to a conclusion before finding out the truth. And the bummer is that even though he has done nothing wrong I am now all hot under the collar and it takes me time to come down from my high and mighty, albeit wrong, location and restore communication.
You would think I would learn.
I have also been the victim of the "I thought" attack having my words or actions misinterpreted by friends and family members and getting attacked for something I never did and having to try to explain to a person that what they think happened did not actually happen. I am sorry they feel hurt but I can't really be sorry for something I did not in fact do. It is amazing how tightly we will hold on to our "I thought". Sometimes those "I thought" fights have completely fractured relationships.
This week I was reading in John (the book of the bible not my husband) chapter 7, where Jesus has been in Judea and the priests and Pharisees are wanting to condemn him. There is a bunch of talk about the fact that they know the Messiah will come from Bethlehem and from the line of David. This man comes from Galilee and everyone knows nothing good comes from there.
v9 "Nicodemus, who had gone to Jesus earlier and who was one of their own number, asked, "Does our law condemn anyone without first hearing him to find out what he is doing?" They replied, "Are you from Galilee, too? Look into it, and you will find that a prophet does not come out of Galilee."
(Ha ha, knowing the truth don't you think that interaction is a little comical?)
The rulers "thought" they knew the truth and there was no reason to ask or confirm the obvious truth that Jesus could not possibly be the Christ. They made their decision, came to a conclusion and condemned Jesus.
I wonder if after the resurrection any of them were saying, "but I thought..."
Our thoughts are powerful things. They can take us to new heights and down to new lows. I often hear God speak to me in a thought but just as easily I can be fooled by lies within my thoughts.
In 2 Cor it says, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."
To control our thoughts rather than let them control us. Oh, I dream to teach this to my children. Our minds, they are big places. Too often we think we are in control of our own minds only to find out we are being controlled by them.
As I have "thought" on this topic for a couple weeks now I have been amazed at how often I have seen people respond to something based on their "I thought". It has really changed my perspective on things and on how I am interacting and what truth I am telling myself.
Today at church I was faced with a situation that I have in the past "thought" and gotten mad about but today I gave those thoughts to the Lord and let the truth settle on me and was able to avoid a totally unnecessary confrontation but instead spend my time doing what I was made to do, worship the Lord.
What have you "thought" this week?