Lately my quiet times have been a bit blah. I get up, read, have no thoughts on what I read, nothing new to say to God, the usual, "need money, need a place to live, please help us". And then I move on because there is just nothing else to do or say.
I remember many years ago being in a bible study. a woman talked about God being silent in her life at times and continuing to be faithful throughout it. I sort of always thought it was stupid. God being silent in your life. If you can't hear God are you really listening? Every day you sit down with your bible and you don't hear God? Sorry, that just sounds stupid. Completely counter intuitive. If nothing else the bible is God's word, can you hear that?
But I think I sort of know what she was saying. Lately I haven't had a bunch of God moments. I don't hear his voice specifically talking to me, I haven't had any deep epiphanies. I read my bible each morning, contemplate the meaning of that passage, read through the commentaries in my bible, and move on. Rarely seeing an application to that day or moment in my life. Unlike past moments in my life when it seemed like God could use a totally random scripture to show himself to me. (I would insert an example here but all my journals are packed up in a storage container somewhere.)
Yet God's silence is not like the silence of a friend or spouse. God's silence is very noisy. Because God is everywhere. I may not have a clear picture of how to overcome my identity problems but I do know who my identity should be in, not me but Him. I don't need the voice of God to tell me that.
As I look out the window and see beautiful fall flowers and birds and butterflies fluttering about do I need God's voice to tell me he is present? I know because he tells me he clothed the lilies of the field and feeds the birds. And he says, "Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" Even when God is silent, he is loud. He is present, he has given us his word in the bible and as we read, study and memorize it we aren't just learning words and ideas from some man made book we are filling ourselves with his spirit.
So even when life is dull, nothing is happening, Get up, read the bible, go to work, carpool, make dinner, watch tv, bed, repeat, i t just seems like God is silent in your life, not calling you to anything new, helping you over any hump. But when you really engage in what you know, open up to what the spirit in your life is showing you, God's presence is overwhelming, his voice so loud. "I am here! I am working! I am caring for you!"
This is where a good blogger would insert several pictures of beautiful scenery. But considering the inconsistency of my posts lately I think we can all agree I am not a good blogger. So just open up your last vacation photo album or search nature images on pintrest and imagine all those pictures going along with this post.