It is time for full confessions of all the things I would never, ever do.
This past week I did NOT hit a parked car in the target parking lot. The poor guy wasn't sitting in his car at the back of the parking lot minding his own business when I clipped the corner coming around and hit him. I didn't hop out of the car and apologize profusely to the poor guy. Since there is no way that would happen, the phone did not ring moments after I returned home with our insurance company calling to finish up the claim. After being asked if I needed the name of a repair shop I did not tell him that we would be keeping the dent. He did not then ask me if I wanted an adjuster to come out and assess the damage and just send us a check for the difference after deductible. I am NOT still in disbelief that I am being paid almost $2000 for being so stupid that I can't round an aisle at Target.
I do not already have 2 other dents on that side of the van. There is not a dent from running into John's truck while driving INTO the driveway
(I did not buff the paint out of the dent with Shakolee's At Ease and you can barely see it.)
and there is not a scratch along the side of the sliding door from driving too close to his table saw.
And there is definitely not another dent on the other side from running into John's truck while pulling OUT of the garage.
If you want to know what other people are not doing head over to MckMama's place.